Not feeling so great about myself

I'm sorry there will be no pictures to go with this blog post :( I'm in kind of a down mood right now and I debated whether or not to share this with you, but, I mean that's kind of what I started to blog for, so I could help you and relate to you. I assume you guys kinda get in these moods sometimes?

For me lately it's just been a matter of worrying so much of what my friends think of me. Normally I am quite comfortable around my friends but lately Ive just been feeling like I'm not good enough and thinking "why would they even want me around". I've been feeling forgotten, like if I left and went to another school that they wouldn't even notice I was gone. It makes me very scared to think that I'm putting this out there because I don't want anyone to think that I just want attention. I guess I just don't know what role I play in my friends lives. I want to think that I make a difference in their lives, but I just don't feel that way.

This may sound really weird but the best way I can put it is that I feel like I am that really ugly hairless cat that people either laugh at, say "ew" at, or, say "I thinks it's cute" just because they feel sorry for it. Haha, typing that kinda makes me laugh. Could you imagine going up to your friends and saying "am I just an ugly cat to you?" I guess it's a pretty weird analogy.

Sure, you can gain self confidence with how you look pretty easily if you put in the effort, but it's hard to when you just don't feel important. I like myself, I like my personality, I just can't stop thinking "why don't other like me the same way I like me". Haha, it's pretty complex when I really think about it. Your probably expecting a big ending to this little rant, saying how were all so beautiful and important and other inspirational stuff like that. Its not that I don't think all those things but sometimes you just have to let yourself to feel down and get it out of your system. For me that's not talking to anybody for a night and just being alone doing things like taking a shower, watching a funny video, reading or any other calming activity:) Sorry my post today is so glum, I promise to be more up beat next time. I'm also sorry that I haven't posted in a really long time I will try to get back on my feet ASAP. And please, if you ever experience things like what I have just said or have helpful advice, tell me in the comments, I want us to help one another. Thank you so much for reading, you have no idea how much it means to me. Have a great day!